Without Dash

Everybody needs goals in their lives. If you do not have any goals, you are probably unhappy, bored and feel as if you do not have control over your life, you get depressed. People with dreams and goals in their lives are more responsible, have more energy, are motivated, and are mentally healthier.

This article is not about why we need those goals, but about how to set goals so that we actually achieve them. Instead of: setting your goals, work on it for a few days and then abandon them, because it is too hard, it is not important anymore, or for any other excuse that you come up with to justify yourself.

How many times have you told yourself to start working on your health, to lose some weight, to finally make some money from your blog and become a WAHM, to get more organized, to be less stressed, etc? How many times? And what happens that you never reach those goals? You lost interest, you found excuses, and you procrastinated.

Believe me, I have been there. I’m known for the famous 101 Unfinished Projects!

A reason why people do not reach their goals is because they set their goals wrong. A resolution like “I’m going to lose some weight” is not going to work. Neither does “I’m going to live healthier”. How are you ever going to know when your goal has been reached? It is like cheating on an exam. You are 40 pounds overweight, but since you lost 2 pounds you can abandon your goals because you did lose some weight. Or by having 6 fast food meals instead of 7 a week, you are living healthier. See? You have to set a goal that means something.

Here are a few rules in goal setting:

• Only set a goal if you really, really want to reach it. There is no point to set goals for something that you do not want.
• Be specific and don’t settle for ‘some’ or ‘more’. Use figures that you can measure, like lose 20 pounds, save US$100, be able to run for 1 hour, or get to 1000 daily visitors on your blog.
• Do not set negative goals like ‘not to eat fast food every day’. People do not work very well with the word ‘no’. If I tell you not to think about a pink elephant, guess what you will think about. A pink elephant of course. Our brain ignores the ‘not’. Instead set your goal as ‘cook your own meals’.
• Set a deadline for yourself.
• Promise yourself a reward or incentive when you have reached your goal. People who get paid to reach goals tend to reach their goals better and earlier.
• Set goals that are reachable. Lose 40 pounds in a month is not very motivating, because you know already that that is not going to work. Be realistic and set a goal that you can reach. But don’t make it too easy on yourself. Goal setting is about achievement. A goal like saving US$1 per month is not going to get you motivated either. Set a goal that is just out of reach, but not out of sight.
• Do not set goals according to your best performance. If once you lost 10 pounds in a single week, do not try to lose 40 pounds in a month now. Or if once you ran 3 miles in 20 minutes, do not try to run 9 miles in an hour. You can’t expect yourself to deliver top performances all the time.
• If your goal is very big and stretches a long period, you might want to break it down in pieces.

One of my goals is to make a fortune with this blog in the next five years, but for now I settle with getting an average of 100 visitors per day to my blog. I give myself three months to get there. So, here is my goal:

So, now you have set your goal more specifically and we have something to work towards. The next question is how are we going to reach that goal?

• Create strategies that will get you to your goal. Strategies like ‘eat fish three times a week’, or ‘go to the gym 5 times a week’. You must understand the difference between a strategy and a goal. Strategies are like a roadmap. They are going to bring to the goal.

My strategies to reach my goal: I’m going to write two great posts per week. I’m going to leave 5 comments on other blogs per day. I’m going to submit to one Blog Carnival per week. Etc.

• Then, you are going to write it all down. This helps you not to lose focus. If you have day to day strategies, write them on your calendar. Monday, Tuesday, etc. Make sure you read what you have written every day.
• Tell anyone that could give you support about your new goal. (I just told all of you, and please do keep me accountable). Do not talk about your goals with people who may laugh about it or discourage you. Don’t waste your time on doubters and defeatists.

This is the basic package to setting goals and reaching them. I’ll top it off with a few motivational facts:

• Decide that your livelihood depends on meeting your goal, and you will meet it.
• Force yourself to stick with your plan for three weeks. Then your brain will start to release dopamine (a hormone related to adrenaline) every time you think about your goal and strategies, which is a good motivator.
• Get in touch with people who already achieved your goal. It is easy to stay fat when all your friends are fat. Having healthy and fit people around works encouraging. I like 43 Things, a social networking site where people share their goals and how they reached it or plan to reach it.
• Celebrate when you have reached a milestone or your ultimate goal!
• Live to your own ambitions and goals, not what other people expect from you.

So, what is your goal now? Have you reached yours? Are you living your dream?

Tags: self improvement