A purple bracelet to remind you that complaining is not a solution. According Will Bowen you can make the world a more positive place by not naming your frustrations all the time. He wrote the book “A complaint free world”, which is accompanied by such a purple bracelet.
His method is simple. Wear the bracelet on your wrist and every time you complain, whine or gossip, you have to move the bracelet to your other wrist. You can think whatever you like; it is just about what you say. If you are wearing the bracelet on the same wrist for a period of 21 days you have become a changed person. Bowen explains that you are no longer producing a stream of negative thoughts. By changing the words you say, you can change your thoughts. You are more focused on what you do want and this is good for your health, career, relationship, and even financial situation.
Complaining is for many people a simple reaction, but mostly a meaningless reaction. Events that really give reason to complain like pain or really sad situations are actually quite rare and far apart.
Gossiping and criticizing are the same as complaining, because both are used to show that in comparison to others we are better. It is a way of boasting: look how developed I am, I frown upon that kind of behavior. If your words are not positive and you would not repeat them in front of the person you are speaking of, then do not say your thoughts out loud. Criticizing is the most vicious way of complaining.
Thomas Fuller
Isn’t there a positive side on complaining or gossiping? If you complain about something or someone and others agree with you, it must be an issue worth complaining about, isn’t that right? According to Will it is only useful to complain to someone who can actually change the situation, not when it is unrestrained negativism, which is often the case. The first step to progress is dissatisfaction, but we should not get stuck at the dissatisfaction. Instead of focusing on what we do NOT want, we should focus on what we do want.
However, there is a difference between a complaint and stating a fact. The words can be exactly the same, but the difference is the purpose of the words and the way they are spoken. Try to become aware of what you say, but also why you are saying it. Many comments have a deeper meaning, like jealousy, insecurity, fear, etc. If you find out why you are complaining, you can be a little less vicious and perhaps your complaint can be taken seriously.
Comments 5
Hi, this is Will Bowen, Founder of “A Complaint Free World”. I received a Google alert that you blogged about us.
I really liked what you had to say and the Thomas Fuller quote is great. Thank you.
Posted 14 Sep 2009 at 8:10 pm ¶Thanks Will,
Posted 15 Sep 2009 at 9:44 pm ¶I hope that I have put it all in the right words. I really agree that events worth complaining about are rare and that a positive attitude will help you (and people around you) so much more than all that complaining.
However, I do find that there are days that it just feels so nice to be miserable over nothing and stay miserable. And personally, I’m quite a gossip. I will have to start to work on that.
I have ordered one of your purple bracelets and will try it out!
Thanks for the inspiration.
I haven’t heard of this book, but I totally agree about complaining. I worked with a complainer that people dismissed as someone who was just venting, but she was like poison. Soon everyone around her had their own set of complaints.
Our words definitely influence our thoughts. That’s why men who insist on referring to their wives as a “ball and chain” are destined to have an unhappy marriage.
Posted 16 Sep 2009 at 4:22 am ¶It sure takes some work to stop all of the negativity and move to positivity but it is worth the effort. There is nothing good to say about complaining, whining and gossiping. It just brings the whole tone down for everyone within hearing. Nice post - loved it. Well done.
Posted 16 Sep 2009 at 7:18 am ¶Excellent. A wonderful thought - to live in a complaint free world. The coolest part about it is if you stop complaining then the people around you stop complaining too. It’s hard to be negative around a positive person!
Posted 05 Oct 2009 at 9:45 pm ¶If we all do this then we really will have a completely changed world.
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